Joke of the Day
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It's such a fine line between stupid and clever. Random guest posting.
It's such a fine line between stupid and clever. Random guest posting.
- Black Orchid
- Posts: 25696
- Joined: Sun Sep 25, 2011 1:10 am
Re: Joke of the Day
A train hits a bus load of nuns and they all perish. They are all in heaven trying to enter the pearly gates past St. Peter.
He asks the first nun, ''Sister Karen, have you ever had any contact with a penis?''
The nun giggles and slyly replies, ''Well once I touched the head of one with the tip of my finger.''
St. Peter says, ''OK, dip the tip of your finger in the holy water and pass through the gate.''
St. Peter asks the next nun the same question, ''Sister Elizabeth have you ever had any contact with a penis?''
The nun is a little reluctant but replies ''Well once I fondled and stroked one.''
St. Peter says ''OK, dip your whole hand in the holy water and pass through the gate.''
All of a sudden, there is a lot of commotion in the line of nuns, one nun is pushing her way to the front of the line.
When she reaches the front of the line St. Peter says ''Sister, Sister what seems to be the rush?!
''The nun replies, ''If I'm going to have to gargle that holy water, I want to go before Sister Mary sticks her ass in it!"
He asks the first nun, ''Sister Karen, have you ever had any contact with a penis?''
The nun giggles and slyly replies, ''Well once I touched the head of one with the tip of my finger.''
St. Peter says, ''OK, dip the tip of your finger in the holy water and pass through the gate.''
St. Peter asks the next nun the same question, ''Sister Elizabeth have you ever had any contact with a penis?''
The nun is a little reluctant but replies ''Well once I fondled and stroked one.''
St. Peter says ''OK, dip your whole hand in the holy water and pass through the gate.''
All of a sudden, there is a lot of commotion in the line of nuns, one nun is pushing her way to the front of the line.
When she reaches the front of the line St. Peter says ''Sister, Sister what seems to be the rush?!
''The nun replies, ''If I'm going to have to gargle that holy water, I want to go before Sister Mary sticks her ass in it!"
- Black Orchid
- Posts: 25696
- Joined: Sun Sep 25, 2011 1:10 am
Re: Joke of the Day
A married man goes to confessional and says to the priest, "Father, I had an affair with a woman... almost."
"What do you mean almost?" question the priest.
"Well, we got undressed and we rubbed together, but then I stopped."
"Rubbing together is the same as putting it in," explains the priest. "You're not to go near that woman again. Now, say five Hail Mary's and put $50 in the poor box."
The man leaves confessional, says his prayers, and then walks over to the poor box. He pauses for a moment and then decides to leave.
The priest quickly runs over to the man and exclaims, "I saw that... you didn't put any money in the poor box!" "Well Father, I rubbed up against it and, like you said, it's the same as putting it in!"
"What do you mean almost?" question the priest.
"Well, we got undressed and we rubbed together, but then I stopped."
"Rubbing together is the same as putting it in," explains the priest. "You're not to go near that woman again. Now, say five Hail Mary's and put $50 in the poor box."
The man leaves confessional, says his prayers, and then walks over to the poor box. He pauses for a moment and then decides to leave.
The priest quickly runs over to the man and exclaims, "I saw that... you didn't put any money in the poor box!" "Well Father, I rubbed up against it and, like you said, it's the same as putting it in!"
- Black Orchid
- Posts: 25696
- Joined: Sun Sep 25, 2011 1:10 am
Re: Joke of the Day
I am not a Kidman fan but this was funny ...
- Neferti
- Posts: 18113
- Joined: Wed Jan 12, 2011 3:26 pm
Re: Joke of the Day
LOL Indians learning Aussie Lingo.
- Super Nova
- Posts: 11787
- Joined: Sat Dec 15, 2007 12:49 am
- Location: Overseas
Re: Joke of the Day
Thanks Nef.... those Indians are funny.
Love the bbq.
They forgot to clean the grill with beer.
Love the bbq.
They forgot to clean the grill with beer.
Always remember what you post, send or do on the internet is not private and you are responsible.
- Black Orchid
- Posts: 25696
- Joined: Sun Sep 25, 2011 1:10 am
Re: Joke of the Day
Just saw this on Facebook ...
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