Tip of the day

[Gordon]

Don't try to sneak out a fart when sitting on an exercise ball. It acts like a speaker.

[billy the kid]

Never wipe your arse with a porcupine....

[Nicole]

Oh god we need a “men’s shed, lol.

[Gordon]

It wasn't me who farted, BTW.

I was at the workout court at the beach today and there were a few women in a group with their person trainer and one was sitting on the ball and let one go. It sounded hilarious and all her friends and the trainer cracked up.

I've also got a funny nip slip story from a few days ago.

[Black Orchid]

Glad it wasn't indoors and I thought it was you

[The Reboot]

Never wipe your arse with a porcupine....

Careful you will give Bobs an erection.

[Neferti]

Remember that Pizza ad? Kid delivers a pizza and asks for a "tip". Bloke says "be nice to your Mother".

[Gordon]

DIY mozzie trap

Get a large soft drink bottle (the kind thrown at Aussie cab)

Cut the top off about 1/3rd the way down
Fill the bottom half with old brown leaves
Put a few CM of hose over the top part where you drink from
Invert the top and jam it into the bottom part
Tape around the join
Fill with water

The mozzies lay their larvae in the water on the top and they sink down through the hose and swim about in the bottom part, and 99% of them can't find their way back up the hose when it's time for them to become mozzies.

Put a bunch of these in your garden and you'll have very few mozzies around.

[Nicole]

Gordon, do you have a similar cure for muzzies?

[Gordon]

Gordon, do you have a similar cure for muzzies?

We're gonna need a bigger bottle