Domestic Violence

[Aussie]

It is a bitch of an issue and there is no easy solution.

I toss this example to you and I doubt it is rare.

Two people, male and female in their 30s. Not married but in a relationship for about two years and living together. Both spotless records.

Relationship has had its ups and downs, rocky but ongoing.

Out on a social event over the last weekend and she gets thoroughly plastered. He is sober. He decides she needs to go home and she agrees to leave with him.

He drives home. All the way, she is off her head, abusive and lashing out at him, while he is driving.

Get home and inside their Flat. She continues and she is yelling abuse and flailing at him. He gets fingernail cuts to his neck and arms. She tosses furniture around, and destroys the TV set. On it goes and he is trying to restrain her.

(Neighbours hear ruckus and call cops.)

She continues destruction of property and her attacks on him continue. He punches her in her face, causing swelling.

She breaks off, takes a photo and sends photo to a friend.

Situation calms, and some peace is restored. Off to bed and the situation has totally de-escalated.

Knock on door. Coppers.

'We have received a complaint of a disturbance here.'

Both tell Cops that there was a disturbance but all is now well.

Neither make any complaint to Cops.

Cops arrest both and take them to Station. Both are interviewed, and still no complaint is made. Cops see injuries to both of them.

Cops charge both with assault occasioning bodily harm.

Held in jail overnight, appear in Court the next day and are bailed.

Bail condition is that both stay away from each other, and have no contact etc.

His flat, so he goes home to flat. She is taken to flat by Cops and takes what she needs away from the flat.

Both now face that charge of a criminal offence, and neither have made any complaint.

Discuss.

[lisa jones]

God I could post so much about this topic.

Anyone feel like getting depressed ???

Didn't think so.

[Aussie]

God I could post so much about this topic.

Anyone feel like getting depressed ???

Didn't think so.

Go right ahead.

[lisa jones]

God I could post so much about this topic.

Anyone feel like getting depressed ???

Didn't think so.

Go right ahead.

You're not gonna like what I have to say.

Ok but first please could you tell me what your personal thoughts were on the Amber and Johnny Depp trial?

[Aussie]

Zero interest in it.

[Super Nova]

That situation sucks.

This is not the USA.

If the cops deem a crime has been committed, do they need a complaint in Australia, I don't think so.

If I was a cop and I had seen so many domestic abuse situations, I may be included to charge them both.

Once domestic abuse starts, it will only gets worse. Maybe they will both wake up or agree to separate for their long term benefit.

While I think it is a bad situation they find themselves in, and my instinct is to cry foul, on balance it maybe the right thing that will lead to the right outcome. That is to protect both of them.

Also, him punching her in the face is not acceptable applying my "man view" and he shouldn't have done it. How can you hold the high moral ground afterwards even if all he said is true. In these situations, no-one tells the full truth and cops know that.

So on balance... my view is "tough shit". Life sucks. You got busted and did break the letter of the law.

If cops behaved this way more consistently instead of turning a blind eye or seeing it as an acceptable situation that is private to the couples involved, many wifes (and husbands) and more importantly children could be spared the trauma of domestic abuse in the home, the shame and mental damage that comes with it.

[J o h n S m i t h]

That situation sucks.

This is not the USA.

If the cops deem a crime has been committed, do they need a complaint in Australia, I don't think so.

If I was a cop and I had seen so many domestic abuse situations, I may be included to charge them both.

Once domestic abuse starts, it will only gets worse. Maybe they will both wake up or agree to separate for their long term benefit.

While I think it is a bad situation they find themselves in, and my instinct is to cry foul, on balance it maybe the right thing that will lead to the right outcome. That is to protect both of them.

Also, him punching her in the face is not acceptable applying my "man view" and he shouldn't have done it. How can you hold the high moral ground afterwards even if all he said is true. In these situations, no-one tells the full truth and cops know that.

So on balance... my view is "tough shit". Life sucks. You got busted and did break the letter of the law.

If cops behaved this way more consistently instead of turning a blind eye or seeing it as an acceptable situation that is private to the couples involved, many wifes (and husbands) and more importantly children could be spared the trauma of domestic abuse in the home, the shame and mental damage that comes with it.

Pretty much agree with that. Better to be over cautious and everyone lives on to contemplate their actions, than another woman (or man) die because cops failed to act. Far to many woman have died because they were either naive about, scared to, or coerced into, not pressing charges. I think it is a good thing that cops act on the evidence in front of them rather than waiting for complaints.

There is no perfect system.

[Super Nova]

There is no perfect system.

Yes.

I have seen too many serious domestic violence situations, always the man causing the abuse, and no-one did anything even when the cops were called.

Fear is a terrible thing and the main reason a women will not pursue it further or raise a formal case.

[J o h n S m i t h]

There is no perfect system.

Yes.

I have seen too many serious domestic violence situations, always the man causing the abuse, and no-one did anything even when the cops were called.

Fear is a terrible thing and the main reason a women will not pursue it further or raise a formal case.

Mate I grew up in it. My old man was violent towards my mum and many a time the cops did fkk all because it was considered private business between a man and his wife (when I was very young) or even later because mum was to scared to press charges. That was despite the black eyes and bruises.

[Redneck]

There is no perfect system.

Yes.

I have seen too many serious domestic violence situations, always the man causing the abuse, and no-one did anything even when the cops were called.

Fear is a terrible thing and the main reason a women will not pursue it further or raise a formal case.

Mate I grew up in it. My old man was violent towards my mum and many a time the cops did fkk all because it was considered private business between a man and his wife (when I was very young) or even later because mum was to scared to press charges. That was despite the black eyes and bruises.

I can relate to that, my old man was a terrible alcoholic and got out of control occasionally.